![]() You may have heard of intrinsic and extrinsic motivations. As a personal trainer, we learned that people who are motivated from within, or intrinsically motivated, are the one's that are more likely to succeed than those externally motivated. What I've learned since is that there is a chapter in the book on motivation that they left out. Intrinsically motivated goals means something within me is fueling me to energize me to attain my goal. Ex: If I lose 4 pounds this week, I will feel better and feel satisfied. Extrinsically motivated goals, on the other hand, mean I am motivated by something outside of myself to energize my goal so that I can attain it. Ex: If I lose 4 pounds this week, then I will buy myself a new workout shirt. Yet, Terry Warner introduces a new layer of depth to human motivate, and I believe, it is a game changer. "For the only change that matters is a change of heart. Every other change alters us cosmetically but not fundamentally; modifies how we appear, what we do or what we say, but not who we are." - C. Terry Warner author of Bonds that Make Us Free So, let's set aside relating to objects as rewards. Objects don't love us back. This is most likely why they were proven to provide short term motivation only. Next, look at your "why". What would the goal bring to your heart? Good. Now, one more layer. What happens when your inner "why," your heart, adds other people into your goals? You now have a purpose and meaning bigger than yourself. Answer this. Take one goal you have for yourself right now. What positive impact does attaining your goal have on others? In what ways does the positive impact matter? Ex: If I lose 4 pounds this week, I will feel better and add to my health. Then I would be able to play with my grandkids longer and light up each others’ lives. Now I am deeply motivated and rooted in my motivations. Your turn. Why do your goals matter to others? How will their life and your life improve? Perhaps it goes without saying. The deeply rooted our motivations, the more natural our commitment grows. The deeper the roots, the taller the tree. Let’s change what deeply matters. As this year comes to a close and we face the year to come, I invite you to keep Terry's words in mind as you set your goals and deepen your motivations by asking, "Whose life will I positively impact by reaching this goal and what makes this positive impact on them so truly important to me?" By Laurel Elders Edited by Nancy Smyth and Sharon Eaks
The first time I was on a helicopter my friends and I were being medevaced to the nearest emergency room. I was 15. It was a surprise birthday trip with friends up to a concert in Phoenix. On the ride up, the girl driving veered off the edge of the freeway, over-corrected and spun us out of control. The small truck flipped multiple times and flung us out onto the pavement at 80 miles per hour.
That was quite the experience and led to a severe ptsd response in my body anytime someone else is driving, I'm on the freeway or flying in a plane. The fear of enduring another crash hasn't left my side in over 27 years. Last week was the first time I road on a helicopter for fun! It was spouse appreciation at the 943rd Search & Rescue Squadron and Davis-Monthan Air Force Base. I almost cancelled. I was terrified. I decided to push through and..... I survived! I also had such an amazing experience! No regrets!
There are two types of fears we face, physical and emotional. Physical fears are connected to the safety of our physical body and health. Emotional fears are also connected to our safety, but our emotional safety.
The emotional fears are the one's that limit our potential. These fears are what we help our clients examine and become aware of so that they can remove inner-obstacles to their success. Each Enneagram type has a unique Basic Fear and Basic Desire. Our motivations are linked up with our Basic Fear and Basic Desire. Here is an overview of each type and the motivations beneath the behavior:
Often the same behaviors, on the surface, are deceiving. If I strive to demonstrate competence as a Type Five, I might look like a Type Three striving for success. Yet, coaching a Type Five versus a Type Three requires a completely different perspective as the underlying motivations are vastly different. To this end, the Enneagram offers us a powerful self-awareness short-cut for our clients to self-identify what is running the show. Once we become self-aware, we can then shift out of our limiting patterns of the personality and step into our true gifts and human potentials. ![]()
Care to join illuminating, empowering and integrative advancements in human potential?
We are ready to empower positive, insightful and eager new coaches into the world! Learn more about the IICT 9 month Certification in Integrative Coaching! Early registration is open. Deadline: Dec. 15th, 2018 Orientation: January 22nd Classes start: Feb. 5th >> Check out graduate testimonies << >> Review the upcoming program << |
By Laurel Elders, PCCIICT Founder / Senior Faculty Archives
February 2021
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